Taste the Tarxien Experience

Becoming Clear

Our client partner (we'll call him Robert) is struggling with critical vocational and personal decisions. He is very confused, as we all are from time to time.

The Discovering Session pre-work and dialogue reveal a dilemma: How can Robert know the best decision to make for himself, if Robert, the decision-maker, is unknown to himself?

In the Affirming session, Robert is asked to identify and articulate what he affirmed as true for him in his own life and work. What are the values he holds dear? Are they the same values he lives by? If not, why not? What are his goals? Which goals reflect his deepest values and which goals reflect others' expectations? More subtly, which goals reflect dimensions of himself he does not wish to affirm and strengthen?

Robert took considerable time in reflection and writing. He reviewed his family and work history, the expectations he grew up with, and his own interior, psychological history. In short, Robert did a lot of hard work.

Robert began to distinguish his deeper values from those that had been shaping his life out of unconscious habit. He began to overcome chronic fear—fears of rejection and inadequacy—that had kept him from taking healthy risks. In practical terms, Robert developed a game plan to pursue several writing and broadcast opportunities.

Robert comments: "...this session could not have come at a more important time for me. The main feeling I have...is one of lightness, having sloughed off many thoughts and emotions that had been unspoken. This alone is worth a great deal. Many thanks."

What do you affirm as the bedrock principles that govern your life? Which principles govern your life out of unconscious habit and which are from considered judgment? Are you not sure?

Do you know how to help your people work and lead from the foundation of their core principles? Do you know how to embed your bedrock principles into your leadership and your organization?

How could Tarxien help you clarify and affirm your true, deepest principles and help you apply them to your life and leadership? We invite you to contact us at info@tarxien.net.

"The work of the real leader begins within the self. The honest unveiling of wants and needs must start within a leader's own heart. It is from this source that a leader really learns how to exert power. Great leaders gain their impact when they are authentic with others. Doing so requires that they first learn to become authentic with themselves. It is not just about exploring weakness and pain. Real learning is about confronting your own truth. Yet so often, in our dialogues with our selves, we duck our truth and fail to unveil our most precious and treasured wants and needs, even to ourselves."
- Phil Harkins, Powerful Conversations

Continue to Vignette #3: Getting Unstuck | Back to Taste the Experience